Unsettled

She was not a miracle,she was not an adventure She was not a fine and precious thing. She was a girl. I don't cry as much as I mean to, It's a weakness. There's nothing more soothing than to turn the lights off,and in the stillness and the darkness,bawl your head off. Dry up the wells of tears,the wells of emotions.Both good and bad. And with the sole company of your thoughts,reassure yourself back to safety,reassure yourself back to comfort,back to 'keeping it together. Then after this your self medication,stare out into the bleakness,make out shadows in the abyss of night,spin a little humor into that which clouded your day,Sigh or just think of the 'perhaps',the possibility that the next day might bring. Ah,the sun will come out tomorrow,and that blissful tomorrow was only one dark and lonely night away. And then your thoughts put down your healed and heavy laden self to sleep.A hopeful sleep, the kind Annie experienced everyday in

I want him to lay me down on the lid, of the finest grand piano And play me the blues. There's nothing to writing,you just sit at a typewriter and bleed. The paraphrased words of Hemingway.  I feel a tingling in my fingers,as with each letter I put in,I peel back the fences that jealously guard my soul and I watch it pour out before me and flood the screen. I'm often asked how come despite my vision being far from the seemingly perfect 20/20 I never go about life buried behind my thick-rimmed glasses.The answer to this has evolved over the years.I started wearing glasses at the age of 9,I can still hear Mrs Meaney asking if I wanted to put my blush specs case in her 'special drawer'.I still remember wondering whether she now saw me as somewhat deficient,deserving of special treatment. The answer has not only evolved but also gathered depth with each passing year as an antique clock would dust.The thing people don't understand is that I don't nee

                     " What is it about him?what is it about him?"                      "What is it that made you smash your face?"                       "They betrayed me." En.ti.tled: Believing oneself to be inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment. "...The brothers with the silver spoons those are the worst..."              "...When a man's been catered to his whole life because his family's got money or he's pretty,or the right shade of light......" "....We silver spoon brothers think,that just because we went to private school or we were never jailed,black women should be there happy in our presence,I get away with this every single day..." "Men like David don't know how to show up,.....that's the type of guy that's been cuddled his whole life..."                            -P.J                             Being Mary Jane. The