I'm drifting in and out of sleep,  the traffic lights are blinking  and the city,my city is both dead and alive.  I'm happy.   It's been a great night,  and I'm patting myself on the back,  No random calls,  no summoning of past ghosts,  no spineless wavy promises  made at the peak of bridges of songs.   "When the past calls,  don't answer  it has nothing new to say"   And this is just as true  on a Monday  as it is on a Saturday night  when your senses are dimmed.   But the heart wants what it wants  and humans have refined the art  of self-justification  propping up our egos or our will  on flaky ass, half truths  and skewed memories  and skewed interpretations of past experiences.   Not tonight though,  tonight   I am present,  here ,  conscious.  Probably more than I've been in a while.   And the stir in the back,  and the voices around me  rise,  and then drown around me.  Like raindrops drowning in puddles  when they hit the ground.  The banter...